To Catch A Rat
by MidnightCritic99
Summary: After the fall of The Brotherhood of Evil, life has been relatively easy for the Titans. But when a disgruntled and possibly mutated rat comes and wreaks havoc on their home and their pizza. The Titans have to act. Fast. Besides, how hard can it be for six superhero teens to catch one rat? Pairings: Robin/Starfire, Rorek/Raven and Beast Boy/Tofu.
1. The Night Has Barely Begun

_**What originally started out as a rather absurd little thought passing along in my mind turned into madness on this paper. Though, I must say that watching the movie "Mousehunt", along with high amounts of caffeine and sugar also helped in this madness.**_

_**Also, as the tragedy maybe, I do not own Teen Titans. They are property of DC comic. Believe me, I wish I did own them so I could make Rorek and Raven OTP. I would also make Beast Boy more comical. I do however, own the little rat- but that's about it. Anyhoo. Here is the first of, hopefully, many chapters. Enjoy.**_

_**Finally, there will be swearing in this chapter, tons of it. If you are offended by such material, please turn back at this time or skip over it.  
**_

"_Mountains will be in labour, and the birth will be an absurd little mouse." As quoted from Horace, an ancient Roman poet. _

* * *

The winds blew and the rain hammered relentlessly, never ceasing, against everything in Jump City. No house nor shop nor anything was spared from the downpours. Especially hit was the large T-shaped Titans Tower, which stood out like an omen with the occasional claps of thunder and lighting. Her all but one dark windows battered with rain. The scene inside the lit window bore an offending contrast to the dim storm outside.

The Titans, having just finished capturing the pathetic Frenchman thief known as Andre Le Blanc and saved another museum from having its fortunes robbed, was scattered amongst the large common room. Robin was filling away notes on various villains and writing new ones on a desk towards the kitchen, all the while talking to Starfire. The aforementioned Alien had her arms wrapped around his neck and occasionally asking a question to her leader and lover, a smile being ever present on her face. This was normal ever since the defeat of The Brotherhood of Evil.

In the center of the room lay a different, yet also normal, case.

"So he was like 'Excuse me, monsieur. What are you doing?' And I said 'Kicking your ass!'" Beast Boy herald on, his ego quickly going to his head as he stood in front of the gigantic television. To his left, Cyborg was banging his head against the wall, clearly having heard enough of Beast Boy's long winded speech on how he single-highhandedly defeated the jewel thief. In the kitchen, Raven was preparing a cup of tea, her ears stuff a long time ago with ear plugs to drown out her teammate.

"Afterward, the ladies were all over me! I could have sworn that I even saw hearts in Ra-" "Well, if you're so desirable and amazing, how come **I** had to save your useless green ass from being blown to Kingdom Come?" Shot Cyborg, his temper at its peak.

"Because you're not as cool as me." Beast Boy shot back, trying to flex a muscle and failing miserably.

"How about I take cool and shove it up your green ass!" Cyborg growled before trying to pounce on Beast Boy. Panicking, Beast Boy quickly turned into a hamster before crawling into the couch. Taking in a deep breath, Cyborg let out a disgruntled snort before going to the kitchen, hungry for some pizza after a day of defeating villains.

Raven quickly stepped out of the half-robotic teen's way as she floated into the room, not hearing a word of conflict between the boys due to her earplugs.

In her head, she was making another attempt at forcing herself to be happy. She was a part of a successful team, had amazing friends and has saved the world more than once; she should be at least slightly giddy. But in her heart, she feels nothing but two things.

First, that something is missing, like her heart is an ornate necklace with the grand jewel missing right from the middle, she's spent plenty a quiet moment raking her mind for what this maybe, but alas, she has no leads. Secondly, and more oddly, like something's going to go wrong. Like the calm before the storm. The sorceress brushes the last thought out of her mind as she pulls out her earplugs. Seeing no sight of the chatty green changeling, she softly sat down on the couch.

No sooner had she done that did Beast Boy started screeching like a madman. He morphed back to his normal form and began trying to pull his head out from under the cushion Raven was sitting on, a garbled mess escaping the seat. Letting out a sigh, Raven set down her tea and stood up, allowing the shapeshifter to remove his head from the confines of the couch.

"Dude, do you weigh, like, five hundred pounds or something? Cause your hea-vy!" Cried Beast Boy, rubbing his head like a rock was thrown at it.

That had done it. As Raven began to glow a menacing black, Robin and Starfire looked on, with a facepalm and gasp being their reactions respectively. It was like time stood still for the teens as the clueless Beast Boy retained his, unaware of the painful death that was certain to follow.

"I hope yo-" Raven was cut off by a scream of anguish from the kitchen. After a second, Cyborg turned to look at his comrades, horror on his face.

"Th-th-the"

"The what?"

"Yes, Friend Cyborg, what is this 'the'?"

"Th-th-th-th-the"

"What is it!"

"THE PIZZA'S BEEN EATEN! ALL OF IT!"

A crack of lightning painted the outside as the teens stood. Horror painted on their faces. It wasn't until the accompanying thunder boomed before anyone dared to speak.

"What do you mean all of it? We just bought that this afternoon, there's no way it can be all gone, Cyborg." Robin answered, though if it was to Cyborg or himself remained unknown.

"No way! Rabid bunnies with plungers must have taken it! Or maybe ancient voodoo pimp priests!" Beast Boy shouted, certain his theory to be correct.

"Don't be ridiculous!" Robin replied before sliding past Cyborg. What he saw confirmed Cyborg's shock.

"Guys, it looks like we have an uninvited guest in with us." Robin said darkly as he pulled out the pizza box. Inside, all the pizza was gone and the box looks slightly shredded, as if gnawed on.

"Who would do such a traveresty!" Cried Starfire, clearly upset at having the pizza gone.

"I think you mean travesty?"

"Isn't that what I-" It was right then the lighting ceased to work, the room becoming consumed in darkness. "...Said?" Starfire finished with a timid tone to her voice.

Robin went to the refrigerator before opening it, hoping to find some clue as to what devoured the team's favorite meal. Upon opening it, however, he wish he didn't. The inside was a mess of opened containers, claw marks, uneaten bits of food and scat everywhere. It look like something you would find in an abandoned apartment from the ghetto.

"Team, it appears our intruder is not human." He said calmly as he examined the fridge once again. Behind him, the team just stood there, allowing the information to sink in.

"Then- Sherlock-What is it?" Cyborg finally snarled, wanting to maul the thing that stole his pizza.

"Apparently, we have a mouse in the house." Robin calmly replied, stepping aside from the inside of the fridge, where large marks and scat are seen.

'A MOTHERFUCKING, SHIT-COVERED RAT STOLE MY PIZZA!" Bellowed Cyborg, who had apparently snapped. His expression, while downright hysterical, was one of rage as he started foaming at the mouth and his eyes dilated into pinpricks. Oh would there be hell to pay if the robotic teen had anything to say about it. Next to him, Beast Boy let loose a feral snarl, Starfire looked indigent and Raven's expression was neutral, she was boiling with anger. Beast Boy looked again to the robbed fridge and immediately his eyes glowed. Within a second, he had slipped past and pulled out the only untouched piece of food left- His tofu.

"Oh sweet Marth I didn't lose you!" The Morpher cried before kissing the wrapping of the soy based project. Behind him, Raven slap her hand over her face.

Well that did it for Cyborg. With a feral snarl of a monster, he grabbed the offending vegetarian food item before stomping to the other side of the room and, to Beast Boy's abashed horror, opened a window and threw it into the torrential thunderstorm. Beast Boy simply stood there in shock before letting out a sobbing cry.

"NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOO!" He proceeded into begin a long soliloquy on his love of Tofu and how it shall be missed, sobbing the entire time as if he learned his mother had been murdered. The rest of his team just simply stared at him while Cyborg growled his curses to the offending rodent and Beast Boy. Finally, Robin let out a cough before continuing his thoughts.

"Anyways. Team, if this is the case, I'll simply go to tow-"

"OH NO YOU FUCKING WON'T!" Cyborg snarled psychotically, the foam on his mouth dripping on to Robin and the floor, "WE'RE GONNA CATCH IT AND I'M GONNA MAKE THAT THING PAY EVEN IF IT TAKES TILL NEXT CHRISTMAS!" After this, he bolted towards the garage, hell-bent on revenge as he cackled manically.

"Ya! I'll see if I can sniff it out!" Chipped Beast Boy, having snapped out of his depression, before quickly changed into a Bloodhound. He sniffed at the box for a second before howling and darting off into the sleeping wing. On his heal, Starfire chased after him.

Raven sighed before teleporting to her room, stress out and needing a visit to the Nethermore and a nice hot shower before she could begin to focus her attention on pest control. That left Robin in the common room. His expression was that of comical surprise, what with his eyes still being budged in shock and whatnot. This remained for a second before he shakes it off and let loose a sigh. This was going to be a long night. With that thought in tow, Robin placed the pizza box in the garbage can before strolling to breaker box to get the lighting back up.

Project: Catch That Rat has officially begun.

* * *

Inside one of the ventilation shafts in the now abandoned common room, a large furry thing lurked. About the size of a cat and with sharp teeth, sharper claws and eyes of freshly shed blood, the threaten rodent did not know nor care for the death threats on its life. It's ears twitched as he hears the chatter of the Titans, barely feeling amusement at the teens comical reactions. The large rodent wanted several things, mainly being food and a mate. But he also desired to make his house guest's lives miserable. It was funny to see their anger. With that in mind, the rodent paused to sniff the air before heading down the shaft to find some food.

Besides, the night has barely begun.

* * *

_**Well, that's a start for the Titans. Next chapter, another character is added to the mix and more wildly hilarious antics are thrown into the mix. Reviews are absolutely adored and encouraged. So until then, Adieu.~**_


	2. Of Mice and Mages

_**Here it is! Second chapter of To Catch a Rat! I know this seems so short notice for a chapter but I haven't been able to stop typing about it! Plus it seems to be liked well enough so why not. **__**That and I'm currently trying to detox from taking the ACTs so this is my way of relaxing.**__** Anyways, another character will be thrown into the mix this chapter and we see some insanity!**_

_**As it most often is the case, I do not own Teen Titans nor any of the characters used, except the rat. You guys know what would happen if I did own Teen Titans but I don't, DC comics does. I also do not own Michigan Rag or any other references made in this chapter. The Michigan Rag is owned by Michael Maltese and Chuck Jones, who added it to the Loony Toons Cartoon, One Froggy Evening. The other references are not owned by me and belong to their respective owners. **_

_**Again, warning for those who are sensitive to foul language, there is some also present in this chapter along with some interesting moments- mainly between magic users. You have been warned.  
**_

"_The best laid plans of mice and men so often go awry." As quoted from Robert Burns._

* * *

A psychotic laughter rang from the garage at increasing decibels of insanity. It bounced and reverberated until it was but a mere shallow reminder of the noise it was. The Garage slash Laboratory saturated with darkness, with the occasional bouts of welding light being the only respite from the darkness. Towards the wall, Cyborg was neck deep building a weapon he felt certain would bring massive amounts of suffering to the rodent that offended him so by stealing his pizza, cackling and talking to himself as he worked. To anyone who didn't know the Titan personally, and some of whom did, it appeared as if Cyborg had lost his mind.

"Now this goes here. And the bulb goes here. Oh it's gonna be so much _fun_ seeing that fucking thing's guts fly out of it. I could just _dance._" the revenge-obsessed robo teen giggled, before he did a twirl for emphasis. While he stopped foaming at the mouth a while back, his eyes were still small pinpricks and he still had his air of sheer insanity around him. He continued to build his supposed death machine while humming a butchered version of "Michigan Rag" in the dark of the garage, hell-bent on avenging his pizza and his pride.

Unknown to him, he was not alone in the blacken garage.

"…That Lovin' Rrraaagggg!" The teen sung out as he finished his weapon against his furry opponent, which also was the only part of the song he got right. Sure, it was simple in design- but it so easily will bring the _hurt._ With an impossibly wide grin, he reached to grab a engraver to add its name. He felt around in the dark for a moment before grabbing what he assumed to be his engraver from its space on the desk.

Boy was he _wrong.  
_

Once he has picked it up. He and the rodent, whom he had grabbed by the tail, just stared at each other for a few moments before it registered in each other's minds what the other was.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Cyborg snarled before his mouth foamed again due to the _sheer_ sight of the rat.

This remark, however, caused the mouse to bite at the sensitive joints in his robotic fingers, causing the teen to cry out in pain and drop the mouse, which was allowed to scurry into the darkness. Realizing his mistake, Cyborg quickly morphed his arm into cannon mode before blasting indiscriminately in the rodent's area, each time, a threat on the rat's life in graphic ways rang out with rage. Needless to say, the blasting had gotten so bad that smoke quickly clouded Cyborg's vision and he was forced to stop.

A maniacal smile on his face as he felt so certain that he killed the rodent and avenged his pizza before crying out his standard "Booyah!".

The sight he saw once he was done, however, wiped that smile clear off his face.

Nearly everything was decimated in the shop. All his projects were destroyed, along with nearly everything else. The only thing, miraculously, was the T-Car, which appeared to be the perfect condition that he always kept it in. The Robotic teen swore once again before letting out a growl. That rat was going to get it. He let out a breath and approached the car with a careful smile.

"Atleast you're safe." The robotic teen reassured as he inspecting it on all sides with a certain pride and affection. Once he got to the side that was away from him, however, his eyes dilated, his mouth foamed, his ears and nose began to admit steam and he turned a dark mahogany color in rage.

On the back of the T-Car, the rat had, miraculously, not only torn its claws _though_ the titanium platting on the car, but it has the audacity to release itself on the area to boot. Needless to say, Cyborg's hatred of the rodent has official reached an all-time low.

"**You fucking bitch! I'm gonna fuck you up so bad!" **The Robotic teen bellowed at the top of his lungs, of which was so loud that the other titans heard his rage clear as day, before grabbing his newly made weapon and chased off in pursuit of the rodent, cursing the entire way.

* * *

The Rat felt a certain amount of pleasure in incurring the wrath of robotic teen. He just seemed so funny to the rodent how comical the metal man was as he screamed in rage. The rat was currently hidden in another vent in the wall as he felt the thundering steps and threats of the funny metal man roar past. Unfortunately, he carried no food in his jungle of strange objects and the rat hungered once again. He listen for a second to ensure he will not be caught before scurrying down the vent.

* * *

_"You fucking bitch! I'm gonna fuck you up so bad!" _Was the first thing Raven heard as she stepped out of the shower. She let out a tired sigh as she began to dry herself, her acute stress at its peak as she took her time to dry her body. She needed to reach the nevermore and calm herself. And fast. Preferably before she accidently blew something up in her stress. Like her lamp or Beast Boy's window for example. With that, she tied her towel around her and let loose a sigh.

Tonight was going to be a long night.

* * *

The Rat quickly decided that this had to be the best paper he's ever eaten as he munched on the cover of a white tome with sidings of gold. He was honestly surprised he would find something this good in a chest located in this dark room of dull things and boring stuff who's owner, in the rats professional opinion, was equally dull and boring. Sure, it had taken a few minutes to bite though the annoying chains on the apparently old spellbook, but once it did, the rodent was almost giddy with the treat it was devouring now. It seemed as if it was giving the rodent pure energy and power as he began to nibble at its bindings, unaware and uncaring of the faint white glow the book was giving off.

* * *

Something was not right.

Raven could sense it as she stepped into her room, wearing nothing but a towel. She quickly scanned the room with her dark indigo eyes. The fact she did not see anything truly unnerved her, like the time her powers malfunctioned on her after watching a certain scary movie of Beast Boy's choice. Speaking of which, she still needed to maul him for that, she decided quietly as she stepped towards her closet to quickly change and help her friends. She had quickly opened the door to her closet and was to pick out her singular choice of a blue leotard and cloak when she heard a loud thunk behind her. She turned within the second and her eyes widen in shock.

The chest that contained the Book of Nol, the book that housed the dreaded dragon Malchior and of which she sealed him in again, had opened and was glowing a violent bright white.

At first horrified at the possibility of dealing with the dark dragon again, or something even worse, she eventually forced herself to approach the chest, her hand glowing with dark power. At the edge of the chest, she carefully looked in. She had only smallest of moments to glance upon the blinding book before _something_ launched out of the book and on top of her.

Raven swore she was launched back to her home of Azarath as she lay on her back, having her power and breath knocked out of her. So naturally, when she opened her Indigo eyes, she expected the beautiful sight of the towers and city she called home.

Boy was she treated to a surprise when she opened her eyes.

Instead of the city of Azarath in all its eternal, interdimensional glory, she found a male mage of a quite a familiar description on top of her, who appeared to be just as disorientated as she was.

His long white hair, which had faintest hues of silver to it, was sticking up in various places from his trip. His immaculate armor, complete with its R making, glowed varying colors against her potions, and his eye were closed in an attempt to steady himself and relieve his disorientation as he whispered various spells she did not catch she assumed to do such. Raven was in shock. Was it really?

"Rorek?" She softly cried out, confused and careful, uncertain if he was himself or the dragon.

As he opened his eyes of the brightest blue, of which would put topazes of the same color to shame, at his name being called, his eyes budged in surprise and he immediately remove himself from her toweled form. Raven could have sworn his face had exploded in bright pink blush, but it was hard to tell with his black scarf obstructing her full view of his face. Once remembering exactly what she was wearing, or lack thereof, her own face turned a scarlet color.

Finally, after a moment to try and calm himself, he responded.

"You called? Lady Raven." he stated calmly, his voice litted with an English accent. Reven let out a weary sigh, thankful not to fight the dragon again, before starting again.

"Can you turn around, please?" Raven added before getting up, try to preserve her dignity as she went to her closet.

Rorek, being the gentleman he was, turned around without complaint and looked to anywhere but the sorceress he was with. He also tried to calm the bright blush that had consumed his face, but had little success in that area. He was confused as well. The spell he used to seal himself and the dreaded dragon, Malchior, was to release them as well. Yet, the dragon has yet to make his appearance. Where was that diabolical, sadistic, overgrown lizard with a desire for world domination?!

He was going to ask this exact question when he saw something move in the corner, by the bed. While Raven changed, Rorek slipped to beside her bed and looked under it with the grace and stealth of a cat. When he did, he came face to face with a pair of blood red eyes.

The rodent, shocked and angry at having it's meal disturbed, lashed out at the wizard by attacking his face. Rorek yelled, startling Raven in the process, and kicked the Rat, not knowing what it was. Cat like, he was not.

Raven, having gotten her leotard on, turned around to see the thing land on her head. The Rodent simply clawed at her face before leaping off and gave an unnerving snarl before scurrying out the door, behind it several blasts of light and dark magic from Rorek and Raven respectively.

"What in Lore's cauldron was that _thing_?" The Wizard asked after he healed himself and while healing Raven, clearly not expecting that of all things.

Not a second after he finished, Raven grabbed him by the hand and started dragging him out the door and into the hallway, a look of confusion and exasperation, among other things, on her face.

"I'll explain on the way."

* * *

_**Finally, we get our wizard, sixth teen to make a fool of himself in trying to capture this rodent, and love interest to Raven! We also get to see how far Cyborg's desire for revenge has eroded his mental state. Don't worry, he won't be like that forever. Just until he gets his revenge and more pizza. Next chapter, we see more insanity and possible fluff.**_

_**Also, **__**I'm currently taking suggestions for ways the Teen Titans can attempt and fail to capture their little rodent antagonist. If you have ideas, please PM them to me and specify for which Titan will botch a certain plan and there is a chance, a strong one at that, I will place it into my story with full credit given. Thank you guys for your support!**_


End file.
